Your eyes,
I see a smile in your eyes,
And everywhere I go,
Will your eyes, follow?
And those lips,
I wanna kiss from those lips...
And everywhere I go,
will your kisses follow?
See this girl before you?
You know she's pretty scared,
Cuz she wants to get to know you,
wants to wake up in your bed,
And loving you is scary,
Cuz she doesn't know where she'll end,
But she takes comforting in knowing,
That where ever she is going,
If she looks over her shoulder...
Her kisses and smiles are right behind her.
Monday, March 29, 2010
Tired eyes
These eyes are tired,
of welling up everytime
you prove all of them right,
and I,
dont wanna believe what they say,
but it's hard for me to breathe,
when your head is a lock,
and through this maze is the only key.
These days are like fire,
and I am a tree,
Although my seeds have opened,
I'm dying in this heat.
What I thought I could handle,
I don't want to give up,
By admitting my defeat,
Through the thought of something to love.
Why wont you lean on me?
Work through your mistakes?
Try to find the sunlight through the sleet and the rain,
Watching this is scary,
It's killing me inside,
but a promise is just a promise,
as a lie is just a lie.
You told me that the pen,
is sharper than the sword,
and although I'm not bleeding,
it's a feeling I can't ignore,
And what I would give to live,
One thousand of your smiles,
But a promise is just a promise,
As a lie is just a lie...
A promise is just a promise,
As a lie is just a lie...
of welling up everytime
you prove all of them right,
and I,
dont wanna believe what they say,
but it's hard for me to breathe,
when your head is a lock,
and through this maze is the only key.
These days are like fire,
and I am a tree,
Although my seeds have opened,
I'm dying in this heat.
What I thought I could handle,
I don't want to give up,
By admitting my defeat,
Through the thought of something to love.
Why wont you lean on me?
Work through your mistakes?
Try to find the sunlight through the sleet and the rain,
Watching this is scary,
It's killing me inside,
but a promise is just a promise,
as a lie is just a lie.
You told me that the pen,
is sharper than the sword,
and although I'm not bleeding,
it's a feeling I can't ignore,
And what I would give to live,
One thousand of your smiles,
But a promise is just a promise,
As a lie is just a lie...
A promise is just a promise,
As a lie is just a lie...
A sickness
I'm so sick...
Of trying to figure out your shit,
There's a smile on your face,
but what's really behind it?
I want to figure this out
But you just stay silent,
So I'm going home,
My heart it wants to go home.
I'm so sick...
Of holding back on everything,
what's really so wrong with stating my place?
Cuz when I open my mouth,
You tell me it's a mistake,
So I'm shutting up.
You happy?
I'm fucking shutting up...
Whats the point in making a foundation,
if it's moving all the time?
I get the feeling if this was working,
I wouldn't be getting fined,
for having a heart thats filled with you,
you said you didnt want me too.
of making excuses for your head,
my hearts protecting you from my brain,
but much more more of this and i'll go insane,
all i wanted from you,
was to find out if you cared for me too...
Of trying to figure out your shit,
There's a smile on your face,
but what's really behind it?
I want to figure this out
But you just stay silent,
So I'm going home,
My heart it wants to go home.
I'm so sick...
Of holding back on everything,
what's really so wrong with stating my place?
Cuz when I open my mouth,
You tell me it's a mistake,
So I'm shutting up.
You happy?
I'm fucking shutting up...
Whats the point in making a foundation,
if it's moving all the time?
I get the feeling if this was working,
I wouldn't be getting fined,
for having a heart thats filled with you,
you said you didnt want me too.
of making excuses for your head,
my hearts protecting you from my brain,
but much more more of this and i'll go insane,
all i wanted from you,
was to find out if you cared for me too...
Little Clock
I know it's wrong,
but it feels so right,
I shouldn't be knocking,
Knockin on your door tonight.
Little clock,
Tick tick tick
On the wall inside your house is reading,
five past nine.
I hesitate-- but I'm so impatient!
Maybe I should just wait?
Rehearse the lines in my mind,
A conversation I've had with you a thousand times.
but it feels so right,
I shouldn't be knocking,
Knockin on your door tonight.
Little clock,
Tick tick tick
On the wall inside your house is reading,
five past nine.
I hesitate-- but I'm so impatient!
Maybe I should just wait?
Rehearse the lines in my mind,
A conversation I've had with you a thousand times.
Love, Life or Otherwise
With a feathers weight I hear your words fall,
And I have nothing left to build this wall,
This ancient place,
My hearts disgrace,
It's been such a long time,
Since I've felt anything at all...
It's in the way we roll,
How living the life is taking it's toll,
Staring into these blue eyes,
It's life, it's love or otherwise.
The world changes,
The world changes,
As we grow throughout the ages,
What am I to do?
Stuck in these lyrics of you.
So we took the long road to the beach to get away from,
The bustle and the streets and we had dirt on,
Our feet,
Our feet.
We walked along through sun and storm to have things,
To have have things to talk about when we got old,
Everything was gold.
Everything was gold.
It's in the way we roll,
How living the life is taking its toll,
Staring into those green eyes,
It's life, it;s love or otherwise.
The world changes,
As we grow throughout the ages,
What am I to do?
Stuck in these lyrics of you.
And I have nothing left to build this wall,
This ancient place,
My hearts disgrace,
It's been such a long time,
Since I've felt anything at all...
It's in the way we roll,
How living the life is taking it's toll,
Staring into these blue eyes,
It's life, it's love or otherwise.
The world changes,
The world changes,
As we grow throughout the ages,
What am I to do?
Stuck in these lyrics of you.
So we took the long road to the beach to get away from,
The bustle and the streets and we had dirt on,
Our feet,
Our feet.
We walked along through sun and storm to have things,
To have have things to talk about when we got old,
Everything was gold.
Everything was gold.
It's in the way we roll,
How living the life is taking its toll,
Staring into those green eyes,
It's life, it;s love or otherwise.
The world changes,
As we grow throughout the ages,
What am I to do?
Stuck in these lyrics of you.
Havoc Town
Life takes the strangest of turns,
As we try to figure out what we've learned,
Rewrite the stories and reread all the books,
And give back all the things we took...
This is what we will always remember,
A truth that leaves us blind,
When all we thought we ever knew,
Filters through torment and lies...
We can catch the train,
Ride the bus,
Walk in the rain,
Say goodbye to these old frowns,
And treck it back to Havoc town.
Things will flip 180 degrees,
Become something we've never seen,
Say goodbye to these old clowns,
Leave them all for Havoc town...
See these open plains?
Stretching out over the grain,
Relight the fire, relight our hearts,
And dream for a brand new start...
This is what we will always remember,
A truth that leaves us blind,
When all we thought we ever knew,
Drifts away through wind and sky...
We can catch the train,
Ride the bus,
Walk in the rain,
Say goodbye to these old frowns,
And treck it back to Havoc town.
Things will flip 180 degrees,
Become something we've never seen,
Say goodbye to these old clowns,
Leave them all for Havoc town...
Did you see the lights?
That filtered out the night?
A distant memory, I can't deny,
This milky way with you leaves nothing but a smile.
As we try to figure out what we've learned,
Rewrite the stories and reread all the books,
And give back all the things we took...
This is what we will always remember,
A truth that leaves us blind,
When all we thought we ever knew,
Filters through torment and lies...
We can catch the train,
Ride the bus,
Walk in the rain,
Say goodbye to these old frowns,
And treck it back to Havoc town.
Things will flip 180 degrees,
Become something we've never seen,
Say goodbye to these old clowns,
Leave them all for Havoc town...
See these open plains?
Stretching out over the grain,
Relight the fire, relight our hearts,
And dream for a brand new start...
This is what we will always remember,
A truth that leaves us blind,
When all we thought we ever knew,
Drifts away through wind and sky...
We can catch the train,
Ride the bus,
Walk in the rain,
Say goodbye to these old frowns,
And treck it back to Havoc town.
Things will flip 180 degrees,
Become something we've never seen,
Say goodbye to these old clowns,
Leave them all for Havoc town...
Did you see the lights?
That filtered out the night?
A distant memory, I can't deny,
This milky way with you leaves nothing but a smile.
Monday, February 22, 2010
Memoires of a doof gone wrong.
So I'm here... And everyone is alien to me... This place just reminds me of what it used to be like, of what he used to be like; and how completely different that time was to this time now. I feel alone; dark and pitiful. I seem to just walk on by; passing people I know that I discover I don't really know anymore. Everything here is strange, wrong. A picture taking from a scary dream? I feel like I'm at one with nothingness. That I could stay out here forever; wasting away with the rest of the filfth and torment that seems to live rooted deep in my soul.
What was it like? Being happy? Was it a time so far off in your memory? Where you had something goof that you wanted? Where infact, at all was my bastion of true love prevailing? Was it here, in this place? Could it ever be found here? Not here, not in this place.
I am discovering alot about my more introverted side. I'm hoping that by writing this down I'll feel a bit better, but it's really not working...
I'm so alone...
Even with his love, I feel alone. In a room filled with people, I feel alone. Still alone. All I have is this.
Unrequited feelings of a long time ago... A memory that has filled my head, a face, that fleeting, happy face... So what's the point if in the end, we are just sad and alone, with our sickness and our memories?...
Ahh that I could stay here, a frozen memory in time... /Do I really want to die out here? Where nothing is sacred, not even myself?
Where's the revolution man? Why doesn't this shit feel right anymore?
Does anything feel right anymore? All I seem to do is get dumber everyday. I wish everyone would just leave me alone... At least then I would have some direction with my rejection. Instead, I just feel inadequate and boring.
It was Imogen who abandoned me, Out of everyone that I have counted on for being there... And she's nowhere to be found. I suppose it's because I love her, I just want to go home and cry...
...Where is she?...
DEJECTED! LOSER! LOSER LOSER LOSER! -- Why the fuck do I try anymore?
Sadness. Why did she make me go off to be alone? I just wanted to have fun, She always has so much fun. Sitting waiting for everyone but everon is her... But I'm nowhere...
Such a sadness weighs down my heart. So much sorrow and joyless-ness revears in my soul. A black hole in my heart, forever sucking everything I have away into absolute fucking nothing...
I hear distant voices, in the clearing up ahead. Is it real? Is anyone even there? I want her to find me... But she wont.
I think no one will, no one will notice me if I'm gone, no one will notice If I just disapear into this overgrown mess.
Its almost as if I can hear her through all this distance. Why am I obsessing about her? Because it distracts me from him? I think I really would die out here if I allowed myself to start thinking about that mans emotional spectrum...
I wandered off? Over the Edge? -- If I could just see her, know that she was okay?..
My ride appears to be gone. Panic set in, how am I gonna get home? I feel so 'outed' right now... Like suddenly I'm not good enough for her, for him, for the world. What do I have to come home to? What do I want to come home too? That is a good question.
Freak. Fuck an asshole day... Got fucked over by an asshole today, and it will probably happen again.
I thought I was allowed here, accepted here, loved here.
But I'm none of those things... I'm just... Simply here.
Fuck I'm numb. I don't think I could feel a shred of happiness if I wanted too. Just so disconnected from that which I want to reconnect with. Literal bliss, is so far away, inevitably unobtainable...
Nirvana will never be reached, and I have no godly messiah. What happened to the bracelet, all orange red yellow and green... a labour of love, lost to the world and everything in it.
I'm just like that bracelet... Worn until old and tired, then lost... Lost and forgotten.
What was it like? Being happy? Was it a time so far off in your memory? Where you had something goof that you wanted? Where infact, at all was my bastion of true love prevailing? Was it here, in this place? Could it ever be found here? Not here, not in this place.
I am discovering alot about my more introverted side. I'm hoping that by writing this down I'll feel a bit better, but it's really not working...
I'm so alone...
Even with his love, I feel alone. In a room filled with people, I feel alone. Still alone. All I have is this.
Unrequited feelings of a long time ago... A memory that has filled my head, a face, that fleeting, happy face... So what's the point if in the end, we are just sad and alone, with our sickness and our memories?...
Ahh that I could stay here, a frozen memory in time... /Do I really want to die out here? Where nothing is sacred, not even myself?
Where's the revolution man? Why doesn't this shit feel right anymore?
Does anything feel right anymore? All I seem to do is get dumber everyday. I wish everyone would just leave me alone... At least then I would have some direction with my rejection. Instead, I just feel inadequate and boring.
It was Imogen who abandoned me, Out of everyone that I have counted on for being there... And she's nowhere to be found. I suppose it's because I love her, I just want to go home and cry...
...Where is she?...
DEJECTED! LOSER! LOSER LOSER LOSER! -- Why the fuck do I try anymore?
Sadness. Why did she make me go off to be alone? I just wanted to have fun, She always has so much fun. Sitting waiting for everyone but everon is her... But I'm nowhere...
Such a sadness weighs down my heart. So much sorrow and joyless-ness revears in my soul. A black hole in my heart, forever sucking everything I have away into absolute fucking nothing...
I hear distant voices, in the clearing up ahead. Is it real? Is anyone even there? I want her to find me... But she wont.
I think no one will, no one will notice me if I'm gone, no one will notice If I just disapear into this overgrown mess.
Its almost as if I can hear her through all this distance. Why am I obsessing about her? Because it distracts me from him? I think I really would die out here if I allowed myself to start thinking about that mans emotional spectrum...
I wandered off? Over the Edge? -- If I could just see her, know that she was okay?..
My ride appears to be gone. Panic set in, how am I gonna get home? I feel so 'outed' right now... Like suddenly I'm not good enough for her, for him, for the world. What do I have to come home to? What do I want to come home too? That is a good question.
Freak. Fuck an asshole day... Got fucked over by an asshole today, and it will probably happen again.
I thought I was allowed here, accepted here, loved here.
But I'm none of those things... I'm just... Simply here.
Fuck I'm numb. I don't think I could feel a shred of happiness if I wanted too. Just so disconnected from that which I want to reconnect with. Literal bliss, is so far away, inevitably unobtainable...
Nirvana will never be reached, and I have no godly messiah. What happened to the bracelet, all orange red yellow and green... a labour of love, lost to the world and everything in it.
I'm just like that bracelet... Worn until old and tired, then lost... Lost and forgotten.
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